Applications of the Buttered Cat Paradox

November 9, 2008 at 8:58 pm Leave a comment

You may have heard of the Buttered Cat Paradox. You probably have not considered this a means of transportation. The easiest way to do this is to ride it like a bull and try not to vomit, but I have a better idea.

…the Hoverparadox!

Here’s a brief explanation:
The device is powered by three PHUs (Paradox Hover Units):
Paradox Hover Unit
A. A socket-rod system to allow the PHU to spin freely.
B. The oval shell of the PHU
C. Our Contradiction Application Thruster, or CAT. All three prototype CATs are named Fluffy.
D. A piece of buttered toast, securely strapped to Fluffy and the PHU so as to keep everything held together and to prevent injury.
E. Water and kibble dishes (PETA insisted)

Fluffy and toast, while falling with respect to Earth, begin the traditional spinning/floating equilibrium stage of the paradox. This also spins the PHU while keeping the craft off the ground. Possible future versions could include a powerful fan for steering, powered by the spinning PHUs.

Artist’s conception of Hoverparadox pilot: (not to scale)
hoverparadox conception

These will probably be commercially available by 2012, 2014 if we run into further theoretical difficulties due to butter absorption.


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